13 February

From today's department of random:

I had a dream last night that my husband was a bigamist.  At first I supported it; it was a favor to a friend.  But after the fact, as the implications of it set in, I became distraught and felt suddenly that my life was ruined.  I think in this case the subconscious second wife symbolizes the real, nearly full-time second job George currently holds.  That job has been a blessing for the past couple of years, but it has run its course and thankfully soon will end.  As George and I sat at breakfast this morning, I said to him: "Whatever you do, do not take a second wife.  Or any more jobs!"  With a very weary "are you kidding me?" look he said I need not worry about that.  Thankfully, I'm not quite distraught over that job, not as much as I would be if he had another wife.  I just miss him.  A lot.

Random kitty pic.  She was curious about the meditation candle I lit this morning.  Don't be fooled that I do this every day, but today I needed the calm of staring at a candle for a bit.  Curiosity did not kill the cat, thankfully.

And here's my living room re-arranged (with random Billy pic).  The wing chairs are temporary, I hope, to be replaced by a leather (non pet-hair collecting) love seat or pair of chairs in the near future.  We recently received those tables from my mom and dad and I wanted to use them.  Can you tell they are from our family room in the 80s?  I really like them, and like how they modernize and streamline the space even though they are now nearly "vintage".  They are very good quality, as are the wing chairs.  You would not believe how much those chairs have been sat upon since the 1980s, and how firm and comfortable they still are.  Even the upholstery is *almost* back in style again and it is in surprisingly good condition.  I like wing chairs so they'll do for now, but I'd prefer something else for that space.

I know.  I have too many odd patterns in my living room right now.  Above is a picture of our closet office or "cloffice" I've found they're called.  I purchased the pillow at Target in the girls' room section, to "funk-ify" that old chair.  I'd like that old chair to be the most traditional thing in our living room, eventually.  I do like to mix traditional and modern.    

Below is the love seat (with yet another pattern) I tried to move up to the living room as a temporary stand-in for a new love seat.  I tried to do this alone.  It's light enough and I'm just stubborn enough and...see first paragraph about tired, overworked husband...

But then this happened:

As I was trying unsuccessfully to get it up this staircase:

Oh well, the wing chairs will do for now.  And not ONE of those mason jars broke.  I just might move them away from the staircase though.
      

Compassion For Your Body

In my last post I was talking about compassion in my personal relationships.  A subject I'll visit again.

But today I wanted to share a beautiful blog post which to me compels us to have compassion for our bodies.  

Love your body.  Otherwise titled, Eight Things I Learned From 50 Naked People, by Kate Bartolotta.

My Word for 2012: Compassion

Do you ever have words that just ring in your mind, coming up over and over again?  I've been noticing that I do.  Last year a word that filtered through my head consistently was 'integrity'.  Already for 2012 I have a new word, however.

It's 'compassion'.

I've been thinking a lot about compassion.  Compassion for the poor, the broken, the "other", yes of course.  We desperately need more compassion in our world, and I believe we need it in our government too.

But that's not the only 'compassion' I've been thinking about.  I've been feeling a great deal of compassion for my husband lately.  And my daughter and son, too, truth be told.  The kids are teen-agers (or about to be, in Rose's case) and are wading through all that adolescence brings them from heavy school work loads to dealing with mean kids to learning to navigate the world and figure out their place in it.

Compassion for my husband I feel because I love him so, so dearly.  And he works so hard.  He loves what he does as a music teacher and a music education teacher, and he has this amazing ability to focus on it.  Sometimes I've said he's a workaholic, but really for him it's that he's doing what he's passionate about and his focus is admirable and not, generally, unhealthy like an addiction is.

Merriam-Webster defines compassion this way: "sympathetic consciousness of others' distress together with a desire to alleviate it".

And the thing is, my husband gets tired working two teaching jobs, and in the end he's doing it all for us.  Bringing home the bacon. (Speaking of bacon, I should be figuring out how I'm going to cook the pork chops tonight...)  Improving schools by giving kids the gift of music as part of their every day.  Teaching future teachers how to do so as well.  And still being the most wonderful husband and dad I've ever known.

So here my word of the year turns into a soliloquy of love for my husband...and I have a poem to share.  I wrote this in January of 2006, six years ago.  There aren't Legos on our floor anymore, but it seems there is always something.

To My Husband.

I look at you across the room,
room filled with kids and clutter
and the chaos of our lives.
In your warm woolen sweater
patterned with snowflakes and geometry,
I want to crawl in,
to you.
Into your arms, next to your heart,
curled up in a little ball.
Love for you wells up behind my
     eyes. It pools there
in quiet frustration.  Resignation?
Salty,
stinging,
not sweet.
And I don't.
Crawl in, I mean.
The distance is too far,
the chaos too great,
the Legos like concrete barricades,
too high.
Instead I sit longing,
lonely.




(edited to add: Did you see this story today, or hear it on NPR?  Amazing love story, that makes me grateful I get to live every day of my life with the love of my life...http://www.npr.org/2012/02/03/146303291/operator-can-you-help-me-call-the-love-of-my-life)

Virginia Is A Lovely Place at Christmas

George had the luck to grow up in a beautiful place in Virginia.  The state of, for all you Minnesotans who continually ask us "town or state?"  (We have a town called Virginia in northern Minnesota.)  But George grew up in what is formally known as the Commonwealth of Virginia.  It's a beautiful place.  Here are some pictures from our Christmas at his boyhood home...

 The "big boys" flying balsa wood airplanes, overlooking the Ware River.

 The kids having a marshmallow shooting war in the yard.

 The "front" or river-side of the house with its wraparound porch facing the water.

 "Tree Lodge", and the pansies are blooming next to the snowman at Christmas!

 George and Eli walking along the shoreline.

 Rose sitting on one of the many pier posts that have washed up via hurricanes.

 Eli found some treasure along the shore--bamboo poles.

 And George found a lot of trash.

 Father and son chopping wood for Grandma and Grandpa.

 George, his sister and sister-in-law bird watching.

And some of us posing for a goofy self-timer photo.

Our Christmas Trip to Virginia via Amtrak

We traveled to Virginia for Christmas this year to visit George's family. It was our first Christmastime in Virginia since 2005, and it was time for our kids to remember what Christmas at the Zahns is like again. We took the train from Minnesota to Williamsburg.

Riding Amtrak from Minnesota to Williamsburg, Virginia was a scream--for better and worse. Let's just say, particularly on the Empire Builder going east from Minnesota, be prepared for delays and changes of plans. The famous superliner, Empire Builder, originates in Chicago, heads west to Seattle, and by the time it gets to Minnesota it's on the 6th day of a 6-day trip so things can get a little hairy by day 6.

The "vintage" Amtrak station in St. Cloud, Minnesota

Some passengers have been on the train from Seattle, for 3 days, so you might want to keep your distance because they can be a) a little dirty and b) a little loopy. I only had one woman show me the pictures of her pet squirrel. She fit both categories.

Amtrak trains are comfortable if not super-clean. We viewed a lot of gorgeous scenery across America, as well as plenty of what appeared to be the dumping grounds of a Third World country. We enjoyed walking from car to car, taking in the sites and changing to more upright seats in both the Lounge and Dining Cars. The food in the dining cars was quite good, and we appreciated the elegant touches like white tablecloths and fresh flowers. Comfort and food were a big step up from airline travel.

But it does take time. And our train to Chicago was several hours late, which meant we missed the Capitol Limited to Washington, D.C. We couldn't wait 24 hours for the next Capitol Limited to depart east, so we chose the only.other.alternate.route. And that was, illogically enough, taking the Lakeshore Limited train north to Buffalo, Rochester, Albany and finally, New York City, New York. At first we were furious (hence, the scream for the worse) about this. Taking the sensible route on the Capitol Limited wouldn't have had us in Virginia until 8:30 on Christmas Night, instead of our planned 8:30 Christmas Eve. If we missed Christmas Day, we missed half of George's siblings and all of the kids' cousins as they all had to leave for home or various vacations on December 26.

Fuming, we hopped aboard the Lakeshore Limited at 9 p.m. on December 23. There was no other choice. (Lesson number two--right after plan for delays--they don't run as many trains as they do airplanes in this country. Not even close. Or wait, is that lesson number three? Another we learned on the Empire Builder is never take the Lounge Car attendant for granted when she announces "last call for food". You may have 4 hours left of a train ride and no more opportunity to buy snacks, water or coffee. Get your butt to the lounge car and get what you need!)

Fortunately, we had plenty of down time while heading in the opposite direction of our final destination, on our way to New York. We got over it. And started getting very, very excited about spending a few hours of Christmas Eve in a place we'd never been--Manhattan. We would be there from 6:30 p.m. until the Northeast Regional left for Virginia at 3 in the morning, Christmas Day.

We decided that once we got to Manhattan we would take a taxi. And even if it cost a hundred bucks (what would a tour of Manhattan by taxi cost, anyway?!), we figured that would be one heck of a cheap trip to Manhattan.

Once at Penn Station, we checked our suitcases for a few hours at baggage claim. We found the taxi pick-up area and hopped into a van. Boy, did we get lucky. Our cab driver, Arsen from Armenia, was just awesome. Five years in New York City, and he was the biggest fan of the city. He loved showing us around and brought us by or to all the places we could think of. Times Square, Rockefeller Center (the tree! the lights!), the Late Show with David Letterman marquis, Central Park, Battery Park and Ground Zero, Brooklyn across the bridge and to see the "best view of the city you'll ever find" including the Statue of Liberty. You name it, we probably saw it in two short and exciting hours (which, by the way, cost us $75 in fare and $50 for a generous Christmas tip).

Manhattan is crazy-wonderful and we could really feel that amazing vibe on Christmas Eve, when everyone in the city was happy. We even impressed our 12-year old daughter, and that's not easy these days.

By 10 p.m. we were back at Penn Station, ready for a long wait for the Northeast Regional. Fortunately, in that busiest train station in North America, there were plenty of scary-looking NYPD officers and a separate waiting area for Amtrak customers. We felt safe, and the station was clean. We even managed to buy some good, healthy Greek food at a deli-type place in the station. Falafel wraps and fruit-and-yogurt parfaits were a LOT better than those tempting Manhattan hot dog stands (yes, we ate at one of those too, and the hot dogs were terrible. Cold, dried out buns, etc. Not what I thought it would be.)

By Christmas morning we were on a train full of very cheerful people. Even the staff on the Northeast Regional were fresh and friendly. There was a lot of happy banter and story-telling in the cafe car that morning. "Where you headed for Christmas?" was the question of the morning. Many were excited to be visiting Williamsburg, Virginia at its loveliest season (second only to summer when the gardens are in bloom). Some were going to Virginia Beach to see friends. A mother was taking her kids to visit a sister she rarely sees. It was fun, and we were so happy to be on our last day of three days of travel (that was supposed to be two).

We were "home" at Grandma and Grandpa's by 1 p.m. and the family was waiting for us. Presents were opened, stories were told, country ham was devoured for lunch, and a big Christmas Dinner kept us going until the evening.

We Did It!

I don't have time to write a real post today, but it's Debt-free Friday over at the Dave Ramsey show and I feel like screaming from the roof tops: WE'RE DEBT-FREE!!!

We really are. As of yesterday, we paid off our last debt of a second mortgage. It's hard for me to even believe, but as of right now we have no debt other than our mortgage. We have money in the bank. We're taking a couple of small vacations, including a visit to family on the east coast, in the next few months to celebrate. We're working hard all this year at extra jobs, to keep saving money for Baby Step 3 of the Dave Ramsey plan: a fully funded, 3-6 month, emergency fund. And we'll be there before long!

I'll also just add, that on the post just below this one, if you highlight it with your cursor it will show up. Wacky Blogger!

Thanks to Dave Ramsey, Financial Peace University and our leader Dean Bertsch, and class at Calvary Community Church, and to all who supported us through this journey. Which ended up to be a lot shorter than we thought! We've changed our family tree, and there's no way we're going back.

Thank you. Amen!

New Numbers, with Much Gratitude :)

"God tends to pour blessings on people going in a direction He wants them to go. It is as if you are walking or running at a fast pace, and a moving sidewalk suddenly appears below you to carry you faster than your own effort would."

~Dave Ramsey

Check out the sidebar for the new numbers. When the check came in the mail, I right away thought of the Dave Ramsey quote above.

We are ecstatic, and give thanks for a generous gift.

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